Jun 23, 2015

How do you help your children succeed when they are facing the divorce that you’re going through with your spouse? Children suffer a great deal from divorced families but suffer more when there is parental conflict that comes from the divorce.

It’s important to put your children first during the divorce process which means that the kids don’t want to hear about why you hate their dad or how you can’t wait to have the weekend free from them to have some alone time. Always think about what you’re saying or doing in front of the kids so that they don’t have to feel as affected by a divorce. Here are some other tips to help your children succeed through a divorce.

Promote a Relationship with the Other Parent

Don’t punish your spouse by using the children to do so. It’s only going to hurt your kids and it’s not their fault that the divorce is taking place. Both parents will have an influence on the children’s lives so it’s important to promote a healthy relationship with the other parent so that they can be influenced by both parents. Don’t use the kids to attempt to alienate the other parent. Don’t put your hate for the other person in front of the fact that your children love this person.

Careful Planning for Co-Parenting

You have to be willing to co-parent effectively that is intended to benefit the children. This will even need to happen after the children turn 18 when it comes to the college they attend, their wedding day and your future grandchildren.

Lay out a good foundation for co-parenting now so that your children’s best interest is in mind. Don’t complain about the rules the other parent puts in place and focus on positive co-parenting techniques. You need to trust that they are safe and happy when with your ex-spouse without being able to control the rules in place.

Walk in your Kid’s Shoes

Your children are not going to bounce right back after the divorce. You will bounce back quicker than your kids as they will experience pain for a long time. Don’t project your feelings onto the children just because you feel guilty. Think about your children’s needs and their happiness when speaking or making decisions.

Use these tips to help your children succeed when you’ve chosen to get a divorce.